I’ve been away a long time and shame on me for that. Suffice it to say that I’ve been more or less exhausted for a huge part of the end of 2016, for a lot of reasons, one of which was SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder).
In many ways, 2016 was a rough year. For my writing career, 2016 was the year things first started to move. I made my first actual sale, I got asked to join an anthology in its proposal stages, I got a revise and resubmit for a novel that I’d all but given up on, with a couple friends I started a podcast and while it’s still tiny, it’s growing and the people who listen to it actually like it. And this is the first year I actually got paid for my services as a writer/person of language. Not, you know, a lot, but payment is payment, which means that this is my first ever author earnings report.
With a nod to both Jim C. Hines and Kameron Hurley, I decided that I want to do this partly because it gives me a reminder that while this is a passion project, I’m also hoping to turn it into a job. Looking at the numbers, that’s going to come somewhere in the far, far future. But mostly I decided to do this because there’s this persistent idea that writers are a super rich class of people who don’t need day jobs and selling one short story will make you rich beyond your wildest dreams. It doesn’t help that a lot of people don’t want to talk about money. And honestly, I don’t give a fuck, mostly because money in this context is ultimately just data and without data, it’s hard to make informed decisions.
Self-published fiction: 1,32€
At the beginning of 2016 I published a thing under a pseudonym that I intended to turn into a series of things that I failed to follow up on. To this day, I have sold one copy, which was thrilling. On top of that, I got paid for doing some translation work for a book called A Witch’s Kitchen. I did not yet get paid for the short story I sold, because of reasons. That’s going to show up in next year’s income report as the princely sum of 60€ if I recall correctly. Still, it is income from something that I love deeply and that makes me happy.
As you can probably guess, my writing expenses for 2016 were considerably more than my income. I went to two conventions in the US plus a workshop/retreat, none of which was exactly free. This domain and the web hotel it’s on are likewise not covered. Classes, craft books, research reading and just fiction in my field also cost money. I’m in the privileged position of having a day job and a supportive spouse in a similar situation, both of which provide me with disposable income that means I can do all these things and not worry about whether or not I’ll be able to eat in the next three months. At some point, I’m going to need to start thinking about whether or not my writing income actually covers stuff like going to conventions and such but that day is long in the distance.
That short story I sold? It makes me eligible for a Hugo in the short fiction category. Funnily enough, since the print run was only 500 copies, it does not make me eligible for the Campbell Award for Best New Writer, nor to my knowledge, any other awards. The story is in Finnish and put out by a micro press so I’m not expecting to actually get nominated but as a voter, I appreciate writers and creators putting up awards eligibility posts and believe them to be a good thing on the whole. The story is “Jo huomenna kaipaan sua” and it is available in the anthology Marraskesi from Osuuskumma.
If you are eligible to vote on any literary awards, please do so. A literary award can be the difference between a career and obscurity for a writer. But more than that, everyone likes to get acknowledged when they do a good job. And just to be clear, I want you, dear reader to vote according to your tastes, even if they don’t include me.
In any case, here’s to a great 2017! What’s next?Read More
because I am incapable of language. Traveling has been amazing and what’s even greater is that tomorrow I start heading for home and I will finally get to sleep in my own bed.
First, I went to Viable Paradise Reunion where I met with many people who I mostly knew from the internet.
Julie and I drove for hours and hours through four different states and were both exhausted by the time we got to New York. I found my Jay and collapsed.
After which I spent most of the week simply sick and sleeping. But I was surrounded by Hamilton thematics so that was fine. I finally made it to Manhattan on Monday a week after getting to New Jersey, two days before I left. At which point I found a yarn store and got myself Fluevogged.
After which I came to Columbus for the World Fantasy Convention. I’ve met a lot of wonderful people here, some old and some new acquaintances and on the whole it has been amazing. I even got recognized by my voice for my work on Mad Writers Union which more or less made my day. But I’m also very happy to be going home tomorrow.
Tonight I get to have dinner with friends, go to a party with more friends and all in all hopefully have a good time. And did I mention that I’m going home tomorrow?Read More
I’ve been very good lately about actually putting my butt down to write a blog post to be published every Saturday. Today I am still traveling but that doesn’t seem like a good enough reason to stop. Except that I forgot that today’s Saturday. I’m neck deep in writing work, trying to translate back the changes I made during the editing of my recently published short story (I’m not sure I’ll ever actually tire of saying that), writing/editing a new short story for a Viable Paradise alumni thing with the prompt “Snail Rodeo”, trying to figure out what my novel needs to say next etc.
So instead of agonizing about trying to come up with a cool post, I’m just going to make a list of things that are making me happy today.
- My knitting. I’m making an Aibrean sweater out of Madelinetosh Pashmina yarn in the color Flashdance. The pattern is easy to just knit while doing anything, the yarn is soft and pliable and lovely, not to mention that the color warms every cold cockle of my heart and it’s starting to look like I’ll have the sweater done and ready to wear by the time I get back to Finland.
- Eat. Sleep. Knit. Yarnathon. Eat. Sleep. Knit. is one of my favorite yarnstores, if not the favorite and it’s largely because of the Yarnathon they’ve been running at least as long as I’ve been a customer there. Basically, the idea is that every contestant buys a marathon’s worth of yards in yarn and you get various prizes (extra skeins, store credit, that kind of stuff) at specific intervals so you get nice things even if you don’t actually finish the marathon. I especially love it this year because everything is space-themed. The levels are the planets of the solar system, the teams have mascots inside flying saucers (GO RABBITEERS!), several dyers have special space-themed colorways etc. I would probably buy a lot of yarn at ESK even if they didn’t have the Yarnathon, mostly because they carry wide selections of all my favorite dyers (Madelinetosh, Nerd Girl Yarns and Dream in Color for the curious) but the Yarntahon is just a bit of silly added on top that makes me happy.
- Tom of Finland coffee. What can I say? I like my coffee bold. Also, it’s a taste of Finland in my extended American escape.
- Hanging out in the same room with my friend Jay, introverting/working. There’s a fair number of people who will not believe that I’m an introvert, mostly because they’ve more or less only seen me in circumstances where I’ve been making an extra effort to not appear introverted. But the fact is, I am introverted. So while I’m happy to hang out in groups of people, being loud and even bombastic, it also really makes me happy to just be in a room with someone I love, all of us silently doing our own things on whichever medium we’re working in. Today is the latter kind of day and it makes me happy.
- The bath I’m going to have later. For all that I keep complaining that Americans do not understand how showers work, I actually sometimes like taking baths. Especially when it’s a proper bath instead of a half-bath where you can barely get your waist underwater without some serious acrobatics. And, dear reader, Jay has a proper bath. I am armed with a Lush Bath Bomb (Frozen, I think) which I’ve always wanted to try but never got the opportunity before now. I’m very much looking forward to it. Now I just need to choose the audiobook that is going to accompany me.
What’s making you happy today?Read More
I’m traveling for pretty much all of the month. Last weekend the entire company I work for took a trip down to Visby, Sweden. Then Tuesday I left for Martha’s Vineyard and the Viable Paradise reunion. Today I’m at Jersey City and I’m heading to Columbus, Ohio at the end of the month. My partner and my dog are at home and I already miss them both terribly. While I have grand ambitions to travel the world, I am still basically a homebody at heart so anything I can do alleviate the inevitable homesickness is always a good thing. So here’s five things I do:
- Snuggle octopus
Yes, I sleep with a stuffed cuddly octopus. It makes me happy. It’s something I always keep with to make sure I can sleep. I tried it during this past Worldcon with Moominpappa but he just wasn’t as good.
- Photos from home
Lately, whenever I’m traveling, my husband has started sending me pictures of himself, and especially the dog. At first glance, this sounds like something that would make me even more homesick but for some strange reason, it really helps. Things are going fine even though I’m not there to do them or remind them to be done or anything like that.
- Finnish music
I don’t listen to a lot of Finnish music. There’s no actual reason for this, it’s just not something I do often. But in Viable Paradise I started listening to bands singing in Finnish simply out of the need to hear Finnish words.
- Comfort food
Yeah, it’s not healthy but sometimes, when you’re traveling, you just have to take some time out to spoil yourself and make the time away from home be a little bit nicer. Whether this takes the form of watching Mad Max: Fury Road, Alien or T2 for the thousandth time, listening to the Hamilton soundtrack on continuous repeat or just plain old chocolate is anybody’s guess.
- Phone home
Sometimes, it’s the simple solutions. And simply speaking, sometimes you have to make like ET. Although, given that my partner and I are both Finns, these calls tend to get boring very quickly after we’ve covered recent events.
What are your strategies for dealing with homesickness?Read More
I am a huge fan of Twitter. It’s my jam, although, granted, most often I’m more of a lurker than a talker. Which is why I get really cranky whenever someone messes with my enjoyment of it.
While Twitter can be good for marketing, it’s mostly supposed to be for connecting with people. Shouting “buy my book” is not connecting with people. I especially hate it when they seem like nice normal people when they follow you; no “hey go buy my book” filling their feeds or such. Then you follow them back and instantly you get a prewritten “hey go buy my book” direct message. I usually unfollow those people on sight of the message.
The most egregious example of this came in the past year with a person I’m not going to name. They followed me, I noted the lack of “hey go buy my book”-messages in their feed so I followed back. Immediate “hey go buy my book” direct message. But I had a group in common with them and some of my friends were following them so I figured I’d give them another chance. Boy howdy was that a stupid decision.
Later on, it might have been that same day or a later one we were at the same event and they came over as I was talking to my friend because they knew said friend. I recognized their name and told them so. They proceed to ignore me completely in favor of explaining to my friend that they do regular Twitter blasts in order to have a good pool of dupes following them when their next book comes out. It was among the rudest things I have ever experienced coming from someone who was completely sober at the time.
So many people seem to have entirely forgotten the social component of social media. I think that’s at least part of what’s behind the excoriations of social media and people being “addicted” to their smartphones, eschewing “real human contact” in favor of what’s on their screens. But here’s the thing; I have five best friends. Two of them live in Helsinki. One lives in Boston, another in New Jersey, another in Baltimore. If I don’t have the smartphone, I don’t talk to my best friends. Twitter is one of the ways I keep in touch with my friends, best and not so best. Don’t you dare sully that by trying to make it into a marketplace for spam.Read More
I’m a tremendously excitable person. It’s just who I’ve always been despite the best efforts of various bullies in my childhood. So this past week, when I fell asleep during the final Q&A of the SpaceX Mars livecast, I expected to wake up to headlines talking about Musk’s vision of having people on Mars in the 2030’s. He has a plan, he has the funding, he’s close to having the technology. This is not a mad scheme. My dismay at finding zero news was great. So I started to enthuse about it to everyone who would listen. Fairly quickly after that, I started to realize the problem; we have all collectively lost hope.
And who can blame us? America is in the middle of a long hangover, climate change is getting worse and here at home a neo-nazi killed a man for disagreeing with him, in a public place, in the middle of the day and our country’s leaders are collectively failing to address that in any meaningful way. I get it, things are looking fairly bleak all around.
The thing is, these things go in cycles. And we, as a species keep getting better. Yes, we have done some horrifying things to each other and continue to do some horrifying things to others and ourselves but still, the number of wars fought by humanity at large is on a downward trend, and we as a species are remarkably inventive. We are capable of coming up with solutions to hard problems when we manage to find the political will to do the thing, whatever that thing is.
In the end, things are going to be alright. I basically have to believe in that. The hope will find its way back to us and we’ll do the things that will further empathy in the world and somehow find a way to divert the disastrous march of climate change. And someday, maybe, the hopey-changey stuff will maybe be a good thing again. Meanwhile, it’s a good idea for all to put their shoulders to the wheel to make a better future. For hope.Read More
As a storyteller myself, I love the potential inherent in all fairy-tales. They are stories we have been telling each other for centuries and still haven’t finished telling. Even something like The Little Mermaid, which is much younger than her compatriots Sleeping Beauty or Cinderella can find new facets again and again. Her dissolving into the foam of the sea seems like such a neat ending, doesn’t it? She’s spent her entire life in the water, you’d think she’d be a good swimmer, right? What if she went off and spent the remaining 300 or so years she has among the humans? What if she got over having a broken heart like the rest of us have done since the dawn of time and went off to have adventures? Would she still be the same girl that chose not to kill the new life she’d gained in order to return to the old? Would she choose differently after a couple of centuries of loving and losing?
I’m sure I’m not the only one who wonders these things. Given the amount of fairy-tale based fiction I see coming every year, I am certain, I’m not. And from the amount of money Disney makes from remaking every fairy-tale they can get their hands on into pretty, safe, pre-packaged things every year, I’m pretty sure it’ll take the end of the world for me to be left alone with this particular proclivity.
The thing that I love most about fairy-tales though, is the women. Often, the literal reading of a fairy-tale has the women becoming victims or sweet and submissive maidens to be rescued. But these are the stories adults used to tell each other around fires or women used to tell each other while they worked. With a subtext of sex and a young woman’s burgeoning womanhood, anyone can probably imagine the tone Little Red Riding Hood’s “Why Grandmother, what big… arms you have!” took on when a group of washerwomen was cackling over the story to keep their minds occupied during the boring manual labor they shared. We see Snow White as the girl who desperately ran into the woods, not the woman who walked out of them having remade them in her image. You have to wonder, how much work went into making Snow White the safe and submissive heroine instead of someone who came back from the dead on three separate occasions.
Meanwhile, I think I have a story or two to write.Read More
I’ve been trying very hard to improve myself as a storyteller and part of it is theme or subtext or what have you. I’m fairly rubbish at subtext. I will eventually see it when I think about the story enough but as a rule, it takes at least a second viewing and a lot of thinking about it before I see it. So needless to say, I’m very bad at putting it into my own stories.
In Viable Paradise, Uncle Jim (aka James D. Macdonald), talked to us about the quadriga, meaning the four levels of any good story. One of those levels is the numinous level. Numinous, meaning “arousing spiritual or religious emotion; mysterious or awe-inspiring”
Now, there’s nothing wrong with a story that just straight up tells the story but sometimes the failure mode of clever is… well not good. And while I do want to be able to write the numinous into my stories, I also do want to avoid the other end.
The best part about this learning process though; the fact that I’m taking it as an excuse to watch movies.Read More