Sep 1, 2017

Posted by in Journal | 0 Comments

Falling down and getting up

 

So, that happened. I went to Clarion, wrote some things, met some people, spent a lot of time in the sun, read a lot. It was beyond amazing but almost a month later I’m still recovering. Usually, I try to sleep at least 7-8 hours a night but during Clarion, my average fell to 5-6 hours per night, even during the weekends. Everyone warned me this would happen, it’s called the Clarion slump. I don’t think I’m depressed as such, just really tired all the time, which, now that I think of it, is one of the symptoms of clinical depression. Just not the only one, which is the significant point here.

Creatively, this month has been pretty much dead. I was tired enough after Worldcon that my immune system just crashed and I spent a week in bed, sleeping. I was beyond exhausted and maybe it wasn’t the best idea to book a lot of speaking gigs, including my first Worldcon moderations (all of which went surprisingly well!). I could go on, but I’m sure you get the idea by now. It’s not the fall that kills you but the endless todo-list.

Now I’m a sucker for 80’s and 90’s action movies. So I’m just going to go ahead and quote Rocky:

It ain’t about how hard you’re hit, it’s about how you can get hit and keep moving forward.

So I’m gonna keep moving forward. I’ve gotten into the habit of scheduling my days in my BuJo and I’m still working on making that schedule into something I can actually follow, instead of vegging out in front of the screen for the entire night. I’m scheduling activities for myself that will help me refill my creative well. Tomorrow, my partner and I are heading to Linnanmäki, a Helsinki amusement park and I’ve gotten myself a museum card which provides access to a slew of museums and, more importantly, art museums all around Finland.

And I’m going to try to get back to blogging. It was something Cory Doctorow talked about during his week as an instructor; he told us that he blogs as an effort to process things for himself. It seems so obvious but that’s not at all how I’ve been using my blog and I think that kind of approach could be really good for me. And, as you can probably imagine, I’ve got a lot of processing to do.

I have a plan, now I just need to get up and execute it. Cause I’m a contender.

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